Parenting Advice #4

The thing about teenagers. Man if I had the answers for how to effectively deal with them, I would probably have more money than Dr. Phil. They are such an interesting bunch. It is almost like dealing with two year olds. First you will go through the terrible twos which inevitably corresponds with the terrible threes. Then you will have a few years where everything seems to be going smoothly until the terrible teens. Teenagers are starting to understand that they are independent creatures, but they are still dependant on adults to guide them. I guess the trick is to let them think they are making their own decisions while you are guiding them. Also, remember that if you are talking to your teenager, that you have to allow them to respond before your rambling turns into a lecture. I remember very vividly that if my parents were lecturing me, I would be thinking about my plans for the evening or who I needed to call. I completely tuned them out. This skill of acting like I was paying attention when I wasn't also really helped me out through college. So, if your teenager is simply smiling and nodding and giving really good eye contact while you are trying to get an important point across to them, you may want to ask them to clarify something you said. It is important to be gentle with your guidance of teenagers because they are really smart little buggars who pretty much want to do the opposite of everything you tell them. So if your teenager is actually reading this blog, you might want to tell them the opposite of what you want them to do and then they might try to do the opposite of that which is really what you want them to do. Or tell them what you really think they should do, and they will be thinking you are really just trying to trick them, so they WILL do what you said, and it will be what you really wanted them to do. Just like your two year old, your teenager needs lots of hugs. Just don't hug them in front of anybody. Also, teenagers need things. They need cars when they turn 16 (If they have really good grades!), and computers (that you can monitor), and allowances, and responsibilities. Now that I think about it... teenagers are a snap!
(I take no responsibility for the outcome of any advice I give unless it turns out how you wanted it to.)